On Dumpster Diving

I prefer the word scavenging and use the word scrounging when I mean to be obscure.

Eating safely from
the Dumpsters involves three principles: using the senses and common sense to evaluate the condition of
the found materials, knowing the Dumpsters of a given area and checking them regularly, and seeking
always to answer the question "Why was this discarded?"

For myself l
have few qualms about dry foods such as crackers, cookies, cereal, chips, and pasta if they are free of visible
contaminates and still dry and crisp.

Eating safely from
the Dumpsters involves three principles: using the senses and common sense to evaluate the condition of
the found materials, knowing the Dumpsters of a given area and checking them regularly, and seeking
always to answer the question "Why was this discarded?"

Home leftovers, as opposed to surpluses from restaurants, are very often bad.

I have discovered
nasty molds in vegetable juices, even when the product was found under its original seal; I recommend that
such products be decanted slowly into a clear glass.

Such shops often get prank orders; both the orders and the products made to fill them are called bogus.

But in the case of discards from student
apartments, the answer may be that the item was thrown out through carelessness, ignorance, or
wastefulness.

I think it would
be unethical to do so, although I know many people will find the idea of scavenger ethics too funny for words.

Except for carbonated beverages, all canned goods should contain a slight vacuum
and suck air when first punctured.

Evidently sorority girls, hoping to impress someone, perhaps themselves, with
their mastery of a womanly art, buy a lot of embroider-by-number kits, work a few stitches horribly, and
eventually discard the whole mess.

I
have learned that there is a predictable series of stages a person goes through in learning to scavenge.

The other kind of kitty surprise is a plastic garbage bag filled with some
ponderous, amorphous mass.

I do not begrudge them the cans, but can scroungers tend to tear up the Dumpsters, mixing the contents
and littering the area.

I have often thought of compiling a book of literary found objects.

Heat can break down the botulin, but this requires much more cooking than most people do to canned
goods.

Those who disparage his profession are the fools, not he.

Certainly I would be happy to have a sinecure again, but I am no longer
heartbroken that I left one.

Also I have not developed much
faith in the reliability of Dumpsters as a food source, although it has been proven to me many times.

But eating from Dumpsters is what separates the dilettanti from the professionals.

I like the frankness of the word scavenging, which I can hardly think of without picturing a big black snail on
an aquarium wall.

But my limited experience with Dumpsters in other areas suggests to
me that even in poorer areas, Dumpsters, if attended with sufficient diligence, can be made to yield a
livelihood.

Eating safely from
the Dumpsters involves three principles: using the senses and common sense to evaluate the condition of
the found materials, knowing the Dumpsters of a given area and checking them regularly, and seeking
always to answer the question "Why was this discarded?"

Anyway, I find my desire to grab for the gaudy bauble has been largely sated.

While Lizbeth [Eighner's dog] and I were still living in the shack on Avenue B as my savings ran out, I put
almost all my sporadic income into rent.

He finds pristine ice cream, still frozen,
more than he can eat or keep.

This can sometimes be deduced when the item is found with many others, including some
that are obviously perfectly good.

Quite a number of
people, not all of them of the bohemian type, are willing to brag that they found this or that piece in the
trash.

I do not
know anyone who knows the generic name for these objects.

It is the isolated patrol of fire ants that falls in Lizbeth's range that deserves pity.

At this stage, Dumpster shyness begins to dissipate.

If a member of the canine race is ever
able to know what it is doing, then Lizbeth knows that when we go around to the Dumpsters, we are
hunting.

Boom boxes, candles, bedding,
toilet paper, a virgin male love doll, medicine, books, a typewriter, dishes, furnishing, and change, sometimes
amounting to many dollars--I acquired many things from the Dumpsters.

But the wino cannot survive on these occasional finds; he must have his daily dose to stave off the
DTs. All the cans he can carry will buy about three bottles of Wild Irish Rose.

I do not
know anyone who knows the generic name for these objects.

Since then I have dutifully
capitalized the word, although it was lowercased in almost all the citations Merriam-Webster photocopied for
me.

For myself l
have few qualms about dry foods such as crackers, cookies, cereal, chips, and pasta if they are free of visible
contaminates and still dry and crisp.

By skulking around, the novice calls attention to himself and arouses suspicion.

Dumpster diving seems
to me to be a little too cute and, in my case, inaccurate because I lack the athletic ability to lower myself into
the Dumpsters as the true divers do, much to their increased profit.

The population of
Dumpster Diving by Lars Eighner http://www1.broward.edu/~nplakcy/docs/dumpster_diving.htm
5 of 7 6/17/08 11:52 AM
competitors rather than the affluence of the dumpers most affects the feasibility of survival by scavenging.

Need I say that home-canned goods are simply too, risky to be recommended.

He can wipe the egg yolk off the found
can, but he cannot erase from his mind the stigma of eating garbage.

Quite a number of
people, not all of them of the bohemian type, are willing to brag that they found this or that piece in the
trash.

Most other forms of food
poisoning seldom do lasting harm to a healthy person, but botulism is almost certainly fatal and often the
first symptom is death.

Since then I have initiated several companions into the trade.

The necessities of daily life I began to extract from Dumpsters.

I have heard people,
evidently meaning to be polite, use the word foraging, but I prefer to reserve that word for gathering nuts
and berries and such, which I do also according to the season and the opportunity.

The area I frequent is inhabited by many affluent college students.

I like to think
that if she survives me she will have a chance of evading the dog catcher and of finding her sustenance on
the route.

One can
extract the necessities of life from the Dumpsters directly with far less effort than would be required to
accumulate the equivalent value in cans.

Dumpsters are full of things of some potential value to
someone and also of things that never have much intrinsic value but are interesting.

Such shops often get prank orders; both the orders and the products made to fill them are called bogus.

The plastic compacts
for birth-control pills usually have complete label information.

Lizbeth is happy to
have any such thing that is past its prime and, in fact, does not recognize fish as food until it is quite
strong.

Something like this drives the obsession to collect junk.

I like to think
that if she survives me she will have a chance of evading the dog catcher and of finding her sustenance on
the route.

Occasionally I
find a cheese with a spot of mold, which of course I just pare off, and because it is obvious why such a
cheese was discarded, I treat it with less suspicion than an apparently perfect cheese found in similar
circumstances.

The labels bear the name of the
patient, the name of the doctor, and the name of the drug.

Anyway, I find my desire to grab for the gaudy bauble has been largely sated.

From time to time one of my companions, aware of the source of my provisions, will ask, "Do you think these
crackers are really safe to eat?" or some reason it is most often the crackers they ask about.

Leafy vegetables, grapes,
cauliflower, broccoli, and similar things may be contaminated by liquids and may be impractical to wash.

Can scroungers will even go through individual garbage cans,
something I have never seen a scavenger do.

I mean to put some of what I have learned down here, beginning with
the practical art of Dumpster diving and proceeding to the abstract.

From time to time one of my companions, aware of the source of my provisions, will ask, "Do you think these
crackers are really safe to eat?" or some reason it is most often the crackers they ask about.

City bees harvest doughnut glaze and this makes the Dumpster at the doughnut shop more interesting.

By skulking around, the novice calls attention to himself and arouses suspicion.

Canned goods, for example, turn up fairly often in the Dumpsters I frequent.

Anyway, I find my desire to grab for the gaudy bauble has been largely sated.

If indeed this was meant to discourage me, it was a wasted effort
because I am a native Texan.

The other kind of kitty surprise is a plastic garbage bag filled with some
ponderous, amorphous mass.

Do not think I refrain from chuckling as I make gifts from these kits.

To those psychologically or physically unprepared to enter a Dumpster, I recommend a stout stick,
preferable with some barb or hook at one end.

The products to be discarded are boxed up because inventory is
kept by counting boxes: A boxed pizza can be written off; an unboxed pizza does not exist.

I have heard of people maliciously contaminating discarded food and even handouts, but mostly I have
heard of this from people with vivid imaginations who have had no experience with the Dumpsters
themselves.

In general, prepared
food requires caution, but in this case I knew when the shop closed and went to the Dumpster as soon as
the last of the help left.

Students throw out canned goods and staples at the end of semesters and when they give up college at
midterm.

In the area I know best I have never discovered vermin in the Dumpsters, but there are two kinds of kitty
surprise.

Despite all of this sensitive information, I have had only one apartment resident object to my going through
the Dumpster.

As I have no access to health care, I often hoard essential drugs, such as
antibiotics and antihistamines.

Despite all of this sensitive information, I have had only one apartment resident object to my going through
the Dumpster.

Although I hope to get off the streets so that Lizbeth can have a
long and comfortable old age, I know this hope is not very realistic.

I think it a sound and honorable niche,
although if I could I would naturally prefer to live the comfortable consumer life, perhaps--and only
perhaps--as a slightly less wasteful consumer, owing to what I have learned as a scavenger.

The area I frequent is inhabited by many affluent college students.

Most other forms of food
poisoning seldom do lasting harm to a healthy person, but botulism is almost certainly fatal and often the
first symptom is death.

I avoid ethnic foods I am
unfamiliar with.

I think of scavenging as a modern form of self-reliance.

Bulging, rusty, and dented cans and cans that spew when punctured
should be avoided, especially when the contents are not very acidic or syrupy.

Antibiotics, for example, even when indicated are worse than useless if taken in insufficient
amounts.)

I prefer the word scavenging and use the word scrounging when I mean to be obscure.

These are drug addicts and winos,
mostly the latter because the amounts are so small.

Since I have learned to react promptly, she
does not get bitten at all.

By skulking around, the novice calls attention to himself and arouses suspicion.

To live on the street I must anticipate my needs to a
certain extent: I must pick up and save warm bedding I find in August because it will not be found in
Dumpsters in November.

Something like this drives the obsession to collect junk.

Raw fruits and vegetables with intact skins seem perfectly safe to me, excluding of course the obviously
rotten.

But my limited experience with Dumpsters in other areas suggests to
me that even in poorer areas, Dumpsters, if attended with sufficient diligence, can be made to yield a
livelihood.

Some divers would have considered this a boon, but being suddenly intoxicated in
a public place in the early afternoon is not my idea of a good time.

Perhaps everyone who has a kitchen and a regular supply of groceries has at one time or another, made a
sandwich and eaten half of it before discovering mold on the bread or got a mouthful of milk before realizing
the milk had turned.

So I find it advantageous to keep an eye on the academic
calendar.

Except for carbonated beverages, all canned goods should contain a slight vacuum
and suck air when first punctured.

I think it would
be unethical to do so, although I know many people will find the idea of scavenger ethics too funny for words.

Raw fruits and vegetables with intact skins seem perfectly safe to me, excluding of course the obviously
rotten.

Every bit of glass may be a diamond, they think, and all that glistens, gold.

She already knows the route around the best ones.

The population of
Dumpster Diving by Lars Eighner http://www1.broward.edu/~nplakcy/docs/dumpster_diving.htm
5 of 7 6/17/08 11:52 AM
competitors rather than the affluence of the dumpers most affects the feasibility of survival by scavenging.

Their ideas of the values of various pieces
of junk verge on the psychotic.

My more athletic companions have
often demonstrated to me that they can extract much good material from a Dumpster I have already been
over.

So I find it advantageous to keep an eye on the academic
calendar.

I have learned not to ignore this warning from Lizbeth, whether I
perceive the tiny ants or, not, but to remove ourselves at Lizbeth's first pas de bouree.

And spirits also turn up after big party weekends, presumably discarded by the newly
reformed.

When I
find canned goods or other objects loose at the bottom of a Dumpster, I lower a bag into it, roll the desired
object into the bag, and then hoist the bag out-- a procedure more easily described than executed.

In any event, after having survived nearly
ten years of government service, where everything is geared to the lowest common denominator, work that
rewards initiative and effort.

I think it would
be unethical to do so, although I know many people will find the idea of scavenger ethics too funny for words.

He is ashamed of being seen and may lurk
around, trying to duck behind things, or he may try to dive at night.

The food they claim is not
much of a loss, but they are vicious and aggressive.

Once I was the sort of person who invests objects with sentimental value.

One is alley cats who I meet as they leap, claws first, out of Dumpsters.

After all, the finding of objects is becoming something of an urban art.

When I
find canned goods or other objects loose at the bottom of a Dumpster, I lower a bag into it, roll the desired
object into the bag, and then hoist the bag out-- a procedure more easily described than executed.

Students throw out many good things, including food.

As for collecting objects, I usually restrict myself to collecting one kind of small object at a time, such as
pocket calculators, sunglasses, or campaign buttons.

While it lasted I had a steady supply of fresh, sometimes warm pizza.

Nothing of the sort is likely to happen to a Dumpster diver because he is constantly
reminded that most food is discarded for a reason.

In particular they tend to
throw everything out when they move at the end of a semester, before and after breaks, and around
midterm, when many of them despair of college.

This is, of course items of relatively immediate utility.

Although very rare with modem canning methods, botulism is a possibility.

Spirits and drugs do, like all other commodities, turn up
in Dumpsters and the scavenger will from time to time have a half bottle of a rather good wine with his
dinner.

I once found a small paper bag containing some unused condoms, several
partial tubes of flavored sexual lubricants, a partially used compact of birth-control pills, and the torn pieces
of a picture of a young man.

It is the isolated patrol of fire ants that falls in Lizbeth's range that deserves pity.

When I
find canned goods or other objects loose at the bottom of a Dumpster, I lower a bag into it, roll the desired
object into the bag, and then hoist the bag out-- a procedure more easily described than executed.

In any event, after having survived nearly
ten years of government service, where everything is geared to the lowest common denominator, work that
rewards initiative and effort.

Do not think I refrain from chuckling as I make gifts from these kits.

One advantage of bringing Lizbeth along as I make Dumpster rounds is that, for obvious reasons, she is
very alert to ground-based fire ants.

This is one of my favorite finds because yogurt will keep for several days, even in warm weather.

But my limited experience with Dumpsters in other areas suggests to
me that even in poorer areas, Dumpsters, if attended with sufficient diligence, can be made to yield a
livelihood.

Most often such things are found in the original packaging, which is not
so much a positive sign as it is the absence of a negative one.

One can
extract the necessities of life from the Dumpsters directly with far less effort than would be required to
accumulate the equivalent value in cans.

Eating safely from
the Dumpsters involves three principles: using the senses and common sense to evaluate the condition of
the found materials, knowing the Dumpsters of a given area and checking them regularly, and seeking
always to answer the question "Why was this discarded?"

I have heard people,
evidently meaning to be polite, use the word foraging, but I prefer to reserve that word for gathering nuts
and berries and such, which I do also according to the season and the opportunity.

Dumpsters are full of things of some potential value to
someone and also of things that never have much intrinsic value but are interesting.

The necessities of daily life I began to extract from Dumpsters.

Home leftovers, as opposed to surpluses from restaurants, are very often bad.

The area I frequent is inhabited by many affluent college students.

A typical discard is a half jar of peanut butter.

This is one of my favorite finds because yogurt will keep for several days, even in warm weather.

As I have no access to health care, I often hoard essential drugs, such as
antibiotics and antihistamines.

Most other forms of food
poisoning seldom do lasting harm to a healthy person, but botulism is almost certainly fatal and often the
first symptom is death.

Dumpster diving seems
to me to be a little too cute and, in my case, inaccurate because I lack the athletic ability to lower myself into
the Dumpsters as the true divers do, much to their increased profit.

AIDS drugs and antipsychotic medicines, to
name but two groups, are specific and are seldom prescribed for any other disorders.

I prefer the word scavenging and use the word scrounging when I mean to be obscure.

City bees harvest doughnut glaze and this makes the Dumpster at the doughnut shop more interesting.

At this stage he may become lost and never recover.

But it is common practice to set aside surplus items:
pairs of shoes, clothing, canned goods, and such.

Leafy vegetables, grapes,
cauliflower, broccoli, and similar things may be contaminated by liquids and may be impractical to wash.

I once found a small paper bag containing some unused condoms, several
partial tubes of flavored sexual lubricants, a partially used compact of birth-control pills, and the torn pieces
of a picture of a young man.

Litter is likely to reduce the public's tolerance of scavenging.

Although very rare with modem canning methods, botulism is a possibility.

Can scroungers lay waste to everything in their path and will stir one of a pair of good shoes to the bottom of
a Dumpster, to be lost or ruined in the muck.

But even if I had a home with extensive storage space, I could not save everything that might be
valuable in some contingency.

Even respectable employed people will
Dumpster Diving by Lars Eighner http://www1.broward.edu/~nplakcy/docs/dumpster_diving.htm
2 of 7 6/17/08 11:52 AM
sometimes find something tempting sticking out of a Dumpster or standing beside one.

I think this is an attitude I
share with the very wealthy--we both know there is plenty more where what we have came from.

Between us
are the rat-race millions who nightly scavenge the cable channels looking for they know not what.

Once I was the sort of person who invests objects with sentimental value.

Not only do the
circumstances of such a find tell the story, but also the mass of frozen goods stays cold for a long time and
items may be found still frozen or freshly thawed.

To those psychologically or physically unprepared to enter a Dumpster, I recommend a stout stick,
preferable with some barb or hook at one end.

Bulging, rusty, and dented cans and cans that spew when punctured
should be avoided, especially when the contents are not very acidic or syrupy.

As for collecting objects, I usually restrict myself to collecting one kind of small object at a time, such as
pocket calculators, sunglasses, or campaign buttons.

To the extent that botulism occurs at all, of course, it can occur in cans on pantry shelves as well as
in cans from Dumpsters.

Dempster's word is too apt.

I am grateful, however, for the number of good books and magazines the
students throw out.

I have learned not to ignore this warning from Lizbeth, whether I
perceive the tiny ants or, not, but to remove ourselves at Lizbeth's first pas de bouree.

Most often such things are found in the original packaging, which is not
so much a positive sign as it is the absence of a negative one.

This is especially thrilling
when I have Lizbeth in tow.

Beyond these are foods that cannot be correctly evaluated without additional
information.

While Lizbeth [Eighner's dog] and I were still living in the shack on Avenue B as my savings ran out, I put
almost all my sporadic income into rent.