Katt vs. Dogg: Chapters 10–17

Then, paws trembling slightly, he gathered up all the kindling and broken branches he could find circling the bases of the tall trees.

“Time for supper!” Oscar said to no one in particular because he was alone.
He rummaged around in his knapsack.

The huge mountain lion wasn’t wearing any clothes! And it was walking on all four paws! That meant it was some kind of wild beast. The first one Oscar had ever seen.
The mountain lion crept closer.
It skulked right past him.

“Hello, dogg,” the fierce mountain lion whispered in a hiss. “My, my, my. You certainly are a tempting little morsel, aren’t you? Too bad I already ate my supper. But, then again, there’s always breakfast! Not quite certain what might be on the menu tomorrow morning. Dogg, squirrel, porcupine, muskrat. So many choices. Why, it’s a veritable breakfast buffet in this neck of the woods. See you at dawn, lost little boy.”

“Silence!” demanded the hawkowl. “Your constant bickering, barking, and caterwauling isn’t going to help us find Oscar and Molly, who, might I remind you, are both lost in the wilderness. And by wilderness I mean a dangerous and dark forest filled with wild beasts. The kind that don’t pick up their meals at the supermarket! The kind that eat whatever smells good or happens to wander across their path.”

“Now then,” said the hawkowl, ruffling up her chest feathers and pacing back and forth on her perch, “I wanted to let you know that I’ve called up our elite rescue squad. The finest hybrid hunters in the world: the grizzly wolfbears and the lionodiles.”

“These creatures are combinations of nature’s greatest hunters,” said the hawkowl. “The two grizzly wolfbears will patrol the forests. The pair of lionodiles will search the park by swiftly swimming through its many waterways. My fellow hawkowls and I will provide air support and fly reconnaissance missions.”

More rustling. Twigs snapping. Leaves softly crunching.
Wait a second. A new thought flitted across Oscar’s brain. Softly crunching? That mountain lion was HUGE. It couldn’t softly crunch anything if it tried.

Mustering all the courage he could (it wasn’t much; his courage batteries were nearly drained), Oscar poked his head up an inch and peered over the lip of his hastily dug hole.

Molly wasn’t really sure why she had ventured toward the dogg’s hiding place. Maybe because she hadn’t seen another civilized creature for a while. Not since she snuck off into the woods to work on her emoting skills and ended up getting lost.

Molly wasn’t really sure why she had ventured toward the dogg’s hiding place. Maybe because she hadn’t seen another civilized creature for a while. Not since she snuck off into the woods to work on her emoting skills and ended up getting lost.

“Concentrate on your napping, dear,” suggested her mother. “It’s the only skill you’ll ever need.”
“Plus bathing,” her father would always add. “Mustn’t forget bathing. Feline hygiene is very important.” And then he’d sit down and lick himself.

“Concentrate on your napping, dear,” suggested her mother. “It’s the only skill you’ll ever need.”
“Plus bathing,” her father would always add. “Mustn’t forget bathing. Feline hygiene is very important.” And then he’d sit down and lick himself.

She spotted a tree with two trunks split like a V and leapt nimbly between them.

Holding his sore nose, which made it hard to sniff for directions, Oscar eventually found his way back to his meager campsite.

“Plus,” taunted the katt, “before you could do anything to me you’d have to catch me. And, given your proclivity for stupidly running into trees, the chances of that ever happening are—oh, I don’t know—zip or maybe zilch.”

“Plus,” taunted the katt, “before you could do anything to me you’d have to catch me. And, given your proclivity for stupidly running into trees, the chances of that ever happening are—oh, I don’t know—zip or maybe zilch.”

“Plus,” taunted the katt, “before you could do anything to me you’d have to catch me. And, given your proclivity for stupidly running into trees, the chances of that ever happening are—oh, I don’t know—zip or maybe zilch.”

“Sorry. We katts are nocturnal. Means we stay up all night. And since there’s nothing good on TV this late—not to mention no TV out here in the trees—I decided I’d just hang out up here and watch you being miserable. It’s highly entertaining."
“Go away!”

At sunrise the next morning, down at the Western Frontier Park, the head park ranger was perched on her moosehorse, meeting with the distraught katt and dogg families.

“Oh, joy,” said Boomer. “Just what our sweet little Molly needs while she’s lost in the forest primeval. A pyromaniac mutt running around the woods playing with matches!”

“Oh, joy,” said Boomer. “Just what our sweet little Molly needs while she’s lost in the forest primeval. A pyromaniac mutt running around the woods playing with matches!”

He looked inside the pockets of his torn backpack, searching for his compass.
Gone.
So was his waterproof match holder.
“That kleptomaniac katt stole everything!” he muttered.

So, he just took off. Randomly running through the thick brambles and brush.

“Look,” said Molly, feeling exasperated. “We’re both lost, correct?”
“Yeah. I guess. I mean I can’t say for certain that I’m lost because I don’t know where I am. So, I guess that means I am lost.”