In the Country We Love: Chapters 11-15

by Diane Guerrero, Michelle Burford
In this memoir that led to an appointment as a Presidential Ambassador for Citizenship and Naturalization, the actor recounts how the undocumented status and deportation of her Colombian parents and older brother affected her upbringing in Boston.

Here are links to our lists for the book: Introduction–Chapter 3, Chapters 4–6, Chapters 7–10, Chapters 11–15, Chapter 16–Afterword
40 words 11 learners

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Full list of words from this list:

words only definitions & notes
  1. ideal
    conforming to an ultimate standard of perfection
    The day I set foot on campus, I knew I’d made a mistake. A big one. It’s not that Regis seemed any less ideal than it had during my visit; it was more stunning in fall than it had been in spring, and it was buzzing with the students’ energy of a fresh start.
  2. progressive
    favoring or promoting modern or innovative ideas
    She’d been raised in a progressive community in the Berkshires. When she pulled out a Les Misérables poster and hung it over her bed, I knew she was my kind of roomie. Artsy. Earthy. Cool.
  3. pacifism
    the doctrine that all violence is unjustifiable
    I’d get so attached to whatever I was reading that I’d switch my view. After some Henry David Thoreau, I’d be like, “Revolution is the only way to achieve justice!” Then following a little Aldous Huxley, I’d start spouting off about pacifism.
  4. fascist
    relating to authoritarian hierarchical government
    If I talked in class about wealth distribution being our world’s only hope, and a white girl then made a snarky remark, I’d snap, “Are you talkin’ to me? You fascist right-winged schoolgirl, you! You know nothing!”
  5. cliche
    a trite or obvious remark
    He was—pardon the cliché—tall, dark, and handsome.
  6. blunt
    make less intense
    For a brief moment, the sharp physical pain blunted all other anguish—a kind of temporary interruption to my despair.
  7. gaunt
    very thin, especially from disease or hunger or cold
    My olive skin had grown pale. My face was gaunt. My eyes were bloodshot. I was skin and bones and wearing a turtleneck in seventy-five-degree weather.
  8. hubbub
    loud confused noise from many sources
    By nightfall, the city’s hubbub had quieted to a murmur and Boston slept under a thick blanket of white.
  9. superficial
    of little substance or significance
    I was starting to really dislike my work environment. I mean, at first it was fun and easy money. But it was also mind-numbing and superficial.
  10. angst
    an acute but unspecific feeling of anxiety
    It broke my heart to know that I was breaking theirs. And yet the angst that surged through me whenever I heard their voices was more painful than knowing I was alienating them.
  11. stilted
    stiff and strained; lacking natural ease
    When we did catch up, the conversations were stilted and awkward.
  12. buoy
    uplift or give encouragement to
    During earlier difficult periods, I’d looked to the arts; performance had always been my salvation, an experience that buoyed me in the most treacherous waters.
  13. treacherous
    dangerously unstable and unpredictable
    During earlier difficult periods, I’d looked to the arts; performance had always been my salvation, an experience that buoyed me in the most treacherous waters.
  14. ashen
    pale from illness or emotion
    I visualized my body, ashen and paralyzed, lying across the gravel.
  15. torrent
    an overwhelming number or amount
    “Just everything,” I said—and right there, in a torrent of emotion, the whole ugly mess of the previous six years came spilling out: How frightened I’d been in the months following my parents’ deportation. The stress I was under to take care of myself. The financial disaster I was in.
  16. sashay
    walk with a lofty proud gait, often to impress others
    The house music thumped, the customers clustered around the tables, and we girls sashayed around the smoke-filled room to take orders.
  17. gratuity
    a small, extra gift of money for services rendered
    Every evening, one server would stay in the back and collect all the gratuities, and then we’d split the pool at night’s end.
  18. diplomacy
    negotiation between nations
    I’d moved on from the idea of a career in diplomacy and became more interested in law.
  19. litigate
    engage in legal proceedings
    There was this one lawyer who wanted to improve at litigating by using acting techniques in the courtroom.
  20. thespian
    of or relating to drama
    Another guy just enjoyed being around people and loved the exercises. And there were plenty who, like me, were sticking their toes into the thespian waters for the first time.
  21. inhibition
    the conscious exclusion of unacceptable thoughts or desires
    “Forget about looking silly,” Peter often told me. “You’ve gotta get over your inhibitions so you can fully embody the character.”
  22. seedy
    morally degraded
    It’s not a bad thing; some waitresses make a very nice living. But I couldn’t handle the constant drinking, the partying, the staying up all night, the entire seedy world.
  23. shindig
    a large and noisy party of people
    All the other nameless faceless masses and I stood around in our heels and cocktail dresses, holding glasses of champagne that were really filled with apple juice. Every hour or so, the director would yell, “Action!” and the group of us would walk across the room and pretend we were enjoying the shindig.
  24. tedious
    so lacking in interest as to cause mental weariness
    At certain moments, I was supposed to laugh and/or cough. It was tedious.
  25. voucher
    a negotiable certificate that can be redeemed as needed
    I left the set early without even collecting my voucher.
  26. hokey
    obviously artificial or phony
    It initially sounded like hokey psychobabble to me; it felt weird to say these things out loud to myself.
  27. goad
    give heart or courage to
    “Diane, you’re totally ready,” Dave goaded.
  28. understatement
    something said in a restrained way for ironic contrast
    It blew me away that I’d been picked out of so many girls. To say I was amazed is the understatement of the millennium.
  29. mecca
    a place that attracts many visitors
    Life was clearly moving me toward a career on the stage, and, in order to explore that, I needed to be willing to step out. The place to do that was in the mecca of the acting world—New York City.
  30. interlude
    an intervening period or episode
    After everyone had gotten a turn, we moved on to part two of our class—the musical interlude, aka emotional flexibility.
  31. palpitation
    a rapid and irregular heart beat
    I’d walked in that morning with the hope of landing a teammate and cheerleader. I left with a snarky Brooklynite on board. And a mandate to round up some serious cash, pronto. And a brand-new set of heart palpitations.
  32. gritty
    representing life realistically, even when it is harsh, difficult, or unpleasant
    The first time I stepped off the Greyhound in Manhattan, I felt born to be here. The place pulsates with this insane energy. It’s unpredictable. It’s gritty. It’s real. It’s dangerous.
  33. gravitate
    be attracted to
    The folks who gravitate to New York, people with dreams bigger than the sky, are my kind of peeps.
  34. prevalent
    most frequent or common
    Talent and good looks are as prevalent here as nepotism is.
  35. nepotism
    favoritism shown to relatives or friends by those in power
    Talent and good looks are as prevalent here as nepotism is. To make it, you’ve gotta be damn good at what you do, or know someone who can help you to the front of the line—in many cases, you need both.
  36. strenuous
    taxing to the utmost; testing powers of endurance
    When you want something badly, like to the point of near obsession, the work doesn’t feel as strenuous. Don’t get me wrong: It’s exhausting and often heartbreaking. But while you may be physically tired and your spirit is tested, it cannot be drained.
  37. seasoned
    rendered competent through trial and experience
    “Those types of head shots are totally going out of style,” a seasoned actor at the studio told me.
  38. distinguished
    standing above others in character or attainment
    “I like your nose the way it is.” I’d always thought it was pretty and distinguished, large and with an arched bridge.
  39. render
    give an interpretation of
    I’d rendered her unforgivable, and in so doing, I’d also locked away myself.
  40. contempt
    lack of respect accompanied by a feeling of intense dislike
    Along the way, she fell down, got up, and then toppled to her knees again. But in the end, she always got up. She crawled back to her feet. She stood. And she deserved not my contempt but my deepest admiration.
Created on Thu Sep 05 09:29:38 EDT 2024 (updated Thu Sep 05 18:13:28 EDT 2024)

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