loath

If you are loath to do something, you really don't want to do it. If you are reluctant to go swimming, people will say you are loath to swim, but if they are really mean — they may throw you in anyway.

The adjective loath is used to describe being extremely opposed to something. The term is generally followed by to — "The teacher was loath to let the students turn in papers late, but he made an exception for the girl who had missed class due to illness."

Definitions of loath
1

adj (usually followed by `to') strongly opposed

loath to go on such short notice”
Synonyms:
antipathetic, antipathetical, averse, indisposed, loth
disinclined
unwilling because of mild dislike or disapproval

adj unwillingness to do something contrary to your custom

loath to admit a mistake”
Synonyms:
loth, reluctant
unwilling
not disposed or inclined toward

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